writing

If someone had told me 3 weeks ago that I would soon be boarding a plane and heading North to Ukraine, I’d probably laugh. But that’s it, I’m not going to laugh anymore because I am discovering that since starting Rosie Goes – the most incredulous things happen at exactly the right time, taking me on a journey with a very definite purpose – in pursuit of humanKIND.

A few weeks ago, ‘I put it out there,’ (asked the universe, prayed…what ever is right for you) that I would like an opportunity that is aligned with Rosie Goes and that will help me kickstart this project. My answer came via Facebook! I casually commented on the post of a couple friends in Europe who have started up a Go Fund Me account and a project for refugees in Ukraine. For 2 weeks, these guys collect donations from the likes of you and I, or anyone who wants to help the Ukrainians, then go on a ‘mad’ shopping trip in Germany or where ever, packing the mini van to the hilt with everything and anything.

Just an interesting, random fact – there are limits on the amount of sugar you can buy in a supermarket in both Germany and Hungary, between 2 and 10kg’s but in the Czech Republic, there seems to be no limit…all these factors influence the route they choose to take into Ukraine. The list varies every week and it includes everything from cell phone chargers to body bags. The list alone tells a story. It tells us a story of grave danger, of packing in a panic. Of leaving things like a cell phone charger…which for many of us, is the very first thing we pack, something we absolutely cannot do without! But these people only had one thing in mind – to get away. To get their family; their children, their parents, their wives and their friends away from the terror unfolding on their doorstep.

Ironically, the theme I am exploring right now is ‘Surrendering to what is before you can move forward.’ And ‘surrendering’ is not a word I would choose when talking to the Ukrainians about what I am exploring and writing about. I’m going into war zone, not a ‘surrender’ site. But that’s it, ‘surrendering’ is not giving up.

For me this process of getting to the point of getting on a plane and ‘going,’ has been the most incredible example of ‘surrendering’ to what is. I have simply followed what I have learned so far on this journey. If you keep on hitting a brick wall, it is a sure sign that you are going in the wrong direction. When there is ‘resistance,’ there is not acceptance and things will keep on going wrong or a ‘negative narrative’ born in the past that starts to look like a negative pattern in your life, continues to be proven right -such as ‘nothing ever goes right for me,’ or ‘I’m not good enough for this,’ or consistently blaming others for where you are today, or not where you are. All this points to us not being aligned with our true self and ‘resisting the flow,’ opposed to going with the ‘flow.’

For this Ukraine experience to happen, I have completely ‘surrendered’ to it. I said to myself that I will do everything that I can do to make it happen. I will give it my best shot and commit to it…and I will go if I am meant to go. It was quite unlikely at first, to be honest. I had to get a Ukrainian visa first, and then a Schengen Visa which on average takes a few weeks to get. And to get these 2 visas’, I needed to get an official invite from the Ukrainian government first, I needed finances, insurance and whole lot to fall into place on the ‘home front’ for this to be possible. To add to the challenge, there are umpteen public holidays in South Africa in the month of April and so even less time to get it all done in time for the next trip into Ukraine.

But it has all happened in time. Not without an effort, but it certainly has happened. I am here, about to board a plane and go to Ukraine. I have surrendered to what ever ‘flows,’ paid attention to the timing of things and have connected with people a long the way who ultimately have helped me forward and get to this point.

I am feeling a lot of gratitude right now…and purpose.

I will be updating this site regularly and from here on I hope to take you on a journey into Ukraine, a journey that will make what is happening in Ukraine feel closer, feel real and on a journey that you will get to know the Ukrainians as individuals.

On that note, I must swig back this cup of coffee and get on my way! It’s time to get moving with Rosie Goes, in pursuit of humankind!

Next up:

Daniel will be transporting a dozen cats and dogs to Munich to be reunited with their owners. Update from Daniel below.

“We are going on the 7th-8th of May to Chop (Ukraine) with humanitarian help (food and other supplies).

This time, there is an additional mission:

Anna contacted me to help bring ten dogs and ten cats to their owners that are already in Munich.

The back story is that many people have left and did not have the chance to take their animals with them.

Many of these animals are in contested areas or temporary shelters.

Volunteers are collecting them on the Ukrainian side, then under the coordination of Nadya, bringing them to the border. We will meet with those volunteers and then deliver the cats and dogs to their owners in Munich.

Challenge accepted (although I am slightly scared).

Thank you all for your support!

Your donations are of immense help in making it happen.”

Please share

GO FUND ME ACCOUNT LINK….CLICK HERE!

2. The works of Being Human/Surrender

I walked. A veld fire had ripped through the bushveld, devouring everything in its path. The night was closing in and all that was left were the rocks and the smoldering skeletons of trees standing in defiance.

It was the darkest night yet and I was lost. The usual winter starry sky was eclipsed by a thick layer of mist and smoke, obscuring the path I knew so well. I was a stranger in my own land and nothing felt familiar.

The silence was deafening. The jackal, rabbits and caracal had moved off and even the crickets could not muster up enough energy to sing their song. A sense of nothingness overcame me. I let go. I let everything that is, be. In that moment, I had no past or knew no future, just the ghostly silence of a moment, a blank page void of ink, a map of nowhere.

I surrendered. The fight in me was gone and all that I felt mattered, mattered no more. It did not matter at that point because I had had a change of heart or that something had happened to me that made me realise what is important and what is not, but rather I’d lost all my strength to fight and to hold onto fear. Suddenly the fear of rejection, the fear of being judged, the fear of not being accepted, the fear of losing control, the fear of being misunderstood had all become too big for me to hold on to. Too big and too inauthentic to survive. I had unintentionally let go of my fears and surrendered to the darkness. I was alone, broken and free of the shackles of fear.

It was a long night. I stopped walking. This well-worn path I had used so often was barely visible and increasingly futile as the night curtain rolled down. It was not taking me to where I truly wanted to go. It was a winding path, walked by many but not my own. I succumbed to being lost and found a comfortable rock, curved and smooth in the centre, a rock I could sit down on and sink into.

Cradled in that rock, the night consumed me. Memories and emotions took hold of me and for the first time, I did not resist any of it. I felt it all; grief, pain, anger, rejection, resentment, conflict and aloneness. I felt everything I had not wanted to and on that dark, relentless, all consuming lonely night, I completely surrendered to what what was and what is. And it was a relief to feel my pain.

Rosie Goes

In pursuit of humanKIND

Rosie Goes to Ukraine: I’m on my way

Next up:

The night I surrendered to what is.